sexdrive and the L word(mild cursing)

yeah so more confusion.. lol so I'm using this blog as my own personal vent/worry space. deal with it you three people that might actually read it ;)

K so last night was a very interesting night...well day in general...in the morning I went and helped Andy's brother and sister-in-law move. which was fun.. I got to prove that I'm not totally useless every once in a while ;) and I pretty much love his brother and sister-in-law and their two kids.. they are so friendly and awesome. Amanda is so much fun.. she helps me not to feel so out of place a lot, mostly cuz I think she knows what I'm going thru. I mean I love his parents and they've always been really awesome but I know that they are sizing me up to see if I am good enough for their son and all that fun stuff.. the same(in a lesser manner) from his brother and sisters.. I know it's normal and it totally happens tenfold and my house but yeah I've just never been good with that... but yeah. So anyway yeah so I helped them move in the morning until I had to go home and change for my grandma's 90th birthday open house.. so Andy took me back to my car and we were standing there talking and I said "OK I really have to go as much as I don't want to" and he said "and as much as I don't want you to" and I kinda stopped and went "what? did your shut up filter just shut off like mine is prone to doing" and he said "nope. go have fun" or something like that so I left and went to my grandma's thing(where he was the main attraction from anyone what talked to me... 'where's your guy?' 'where's this Andy we've heard so much about?' etc. none of my relativies actually cared about my life..mind you they all just wanted to see him.. which I find hilarious) and then afterword I called him and said "If I promise to get you home by 9 can I coax you out of your cave?" and he said "sure" and then we talked on the phone (which if I haven't mentioned he HATES!!!!) til I got to his house like 45 minutes later then we went to the junction and ate at Costa Vida and then went to see sexdrive(hilarious! btw!!) and there's this line in the movie where the main character says something like "you love me" to the main female lead (cuz he loves her and she loves him but neither will admit it) and stuff and one of the whole main themes of the movie is the main female lead won't tell the main male lead that she loves him cuz they are best friends and she doesn't want to ruin that and some lady in jail tells her to not be afraid of what could happen anyway so yeah so we were talking about the movie on the drive back and trying to figure out all the messages and stuff like we do and we got to that one about not thinking about what could happen and Andy goes "damn that stupid movie! I don't like that message" and i kinda go.."um....k?" and then we move on like we do well then we're standing outside his house and I'm about to leave and we were talking about the movie again and I said something like "so what was that line you were going to use from the movie?" and he said "I thought you knew." and I said "well I think I do but you tell me.. come on" and he said "nope" so anyway I left and then I texted him after I left and said 'so what was the line?' and he said 'what do you think it was and I'll tell you if you're right.' and I said 'no way in hell cuz if I'm wrong it'll sound totally stupid' then I reconsidered and sent him one saying 'well I'm trusting the fact that I haven't scared you off thus far and the fact that my shut up filter is long since shut off(it was like 2 am at this point).. it was the you love me line" and he texted back and said 'you're right.. lol it's funny cuz it's true' and I went "what's true? you love me?' and he said' well I think from everything I've heard it goes both ways.. but yeah...' and I was lying in bed going "YESYESYES!!!!!!" and I texted back and said "I think you're right ;) I could kinda tell on tuesday'(see previous blog about Tuesday) and he said 'yeah. that and a few others helped lol. But I've thought about saying that for a while now. a few weeks or so.' and I kinda went "actually me too... but yeah it may take a while to get that actual phrase out there in reality" and yeah that's pretty much it.

Now I'm kinda just worried that I'll fuck this up.. like i am prone to doing... whenever things have gotten half this serious in the past I start acting like and ass and push them away... but yeah.. so that's pretty much it.. I'm sure there will be tonz o more posts on this... but that's enough for now