the definition of bipolar

So last night was a roller coaster of emotions....







I got to go hang out with my 3 favorite guys in the whole wide world.



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And My dog Ed got hit by a car and died.



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I was sitting at home bored as hell so I texted Andy and said hey lets go do something.. and he agreed so we agreed to go meet up at the mall and go see one of the two movies we've been trying to see for a while-role models and zac and miri make a porno. So I jumped in my car and headed down to the mall and on my way my phone rang and it was krogman and zane basically saying come play with us... so I told them I'd come play after the movie... (zane has met andy before but not since he was a huge pothead and krogman has never met him.. but since they are both like my brothers they are very protective of me and wanted to make sure he was a good guy and all.. isn't that sweet?) any way. I met andy at the mall and we ended up going to see zac and miri. So We were sitting there waiting for the movie to start and my phone started ringing(it was on vibrate. relax) and my mom was calling me. so I ignored the call and texted her that I was in a movie and asked what was up. The text I got back was something along the lines of 'Ed got hit by a car and died. I'm sorry I didn't know you were in a movie enjoy your movie.' I was pretty much floored.. I showed andy the text and then said "sorry I gotta go call them" so I did and I kinda started crying in the theater lobby when I called my mom and she was sobbing and I could hear my sister in the back crying and my dad was in the back being pissed off which is how he and I show we are really distraught. I was really worried it was just my mom and sister home which is the main reason I called cuz my dad had been out of town for the last few days and if that had been the case I woulda had to go home and bury my dog... cuz my mom and sister couldn't've done it. Hell I dunno if I coulda done it..but I didn't have to. anyway I went back into the theater and just basically turned off...Andy's arm is still prolly numb from the awkward way he had it the whole 2 hour movie cuz I was like right up under it trying to hide and not think. (seth rogan movies are good for not making you think too much.. and porns are too.. so this was a good movie for being able to shut off in)


Then we went over to Zane's house to hang out with him and Krogman and 3 girls only one of which I'd ever met. We ended up watching terrible porn and mocking it mercilessly(yes I realize I'm going to hell. not only for participating in it but for allowing my good little rm boyfriend to participate in it... thats the part I feel badly about...mostly. not for doing it but for bringing Andy along.) then it was time for a coupla of the girls to go home and Krogman had to drive them so andy and I bounced.





Then we went to dinner. Then we went back to the mall to pick up my car cuz it was like 2 am and I knew I needed to go home at sometime...


so we were in the parking lot listening to my music cuz andy's ipod died(much to his chagrin he doesn't really like my music.. well the rap and pop portions.. he likes the stuff he introduced me to.. so I made sure and skipped all that...;) cuz I'm an ass like that) and we looked over and one of his coworkers cars had been hit in the parking lot so we went down to see what was up and he ended up offering a ride to this lady and her friend (cuz he's nice like that...it's one of the many reasons I love him.) so we kinda got rushed into leaving so I couldn't think about the fact that I was going home to a dead pet. so I was fine til I got home.





I walked in and everyone was asleep. Even the three remaining dogs. And I walked in all quiet cuz my dad was asleep on the couch But charly woke up. I walked by and went into my room and I shut the door but not tight and got into bed and Charly poked her head into my room kinda like "is he with you?" and I kinda welled up and I said "come here charly" and patted my bed and she jumped up and curled up next to me and started like whimpering. And I lost it.



I guess I should explain. Charly and Ed are brother and sister. They have never been separated. My dad would occasionally take one or the other on overnighters and whatev but they've always been together for the most part. I don't care what anyone else says. Charly misses her brother. She knows she's on her own now... she's in mourning. They all are... we all are.. every time the dogs get let out they track Ed to where he was hit and his final resting place. every single time without fail. Charly has to be carried in cuz she won't leave.

so yeah.. that was pretty much my Saturday...